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Front of FOOTHILLS 2022 issue, with an image of a mountain range

The Walking Salad

Brandon Kraft


A tale of things long ages past,
Against most other tales contrast;
A quest to whom the lot had cast
Was a fearless Walking Salad.

A Bean came to the Salad's home
And said, "An evil in the land doth roam:
A Cabbage from o'er the seas of foam.
Can you help us, Walking Salad?"

Not one to shy from danger dark,
On journeys often he'd embark,
So, opening the door without remark,
Marched off did the Walking Salad.

Along he went o'er hill and dale,
Walking grimly 'long the trampled trail.
He paused, looking thoughtfully down at a snail,
Which glanced at the Walking Salad.

Suddenly the Cabbage green,
With a face so merciless and mean,
Appeared as on a fork he leaned,
Growling at the Walking Salad.

Up jumped the hero to face the foe,
Feeling on his head a tomato.
Off it came, at Cabbage to throw:
A piece of the Walking Salad.

A barrage of croutons, carrots, and beets
Flew, the evil Cabbage to meet,
And drove him into shamed retreat:
Beaten by a Walking Salad.

Diminished from his former beauty
Was the Salad in the line of duty,
Who saved a land from savage cruelty;
So brave was the Walking Salad.

As salads come and salads go,
Their memories away do blow.
But there is one which you should know:
Remember the Walking Salad.

A tale of things long ages past,
Against most other tales contrast
Has come to its ending at last:
The tale of the Walking Salad.

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